This book contains 100 reviews. These are some of the scariest horror movies in history. The reviews are sorted in order of preference. The ranking of each film is determined by the sum of 7 ratings: stars, gimmick, rewatchability, story, creativity, acting & quality. Each film description contains a synopsis, a list of attributed genres, moods evoked, seven ratings and a three-paragraph review. These films are not for the squeamish. You have been warned!
They take one for the team.
Until the first horror elements surface, this really plays out like a comedy, but don’t let it fool you; this is a dark fucking flick! The actresses pretty much all overact, in an effort to look like they’ve been friends forever, and even that dissipates when shit hits the fan. Some are cute, some gorgeous, some sexy, and some are a little overweight by the movie’s standards.
If you have a sports uniform fetish, thank me later. There are lots of pissing jokes, and perhaps that’s your thing, too. There are several takes on common horror movie tropes, and some work better than others. I’ve rarely seen sports integrated into slashers so harmoniously. There’s gore so extreme it makes you appreciate the comfort of your seat.
You’ll hate the villains the moment you see them. They’re extremely brutal, relentless, and equally stupid. You can tell their parents are siblings. The protagonists have no notion of double-tapping and will eventually regret it. There’s a singing cowboy who doesn’t belong, here, and somehow turns this film into a musical. He’ll surely ruin your experience every time he shows up.